Keep in mind that romance is an important element of marriage. Your partner might consider romance as the true measure of his or her value to your relationship. Be thoughtful and try doing something sweet for no apparent reason.
We are told that people stay in love because of chemistry, or because they remain intrigued with each other, because of many kindnesses, because of luck. But part of it has got to be forgiveness and gratefulness.
Who am I? I'm a survivor. I'm a woman with tremendous inner resources and resilience. I care about people. I believe in 'Do unto others as you would have others do unto you,' and I live by that. I am becoming authentic, and that's important to me. I have surpassed both my parents in terms of emotional stability, happiness and well-being. And i'm a lucky woman. I've deserved my luck.
My best friends are the people with whom I feel safe to talk about mad, sad and hurt feelings. Most other relationships stay at the feeling levels where everything is 'fine,' although we all know that's not true. But My best friends never shy away from those times when we feel the neediest. when our feelings have been hurt, when we are so angry we could spit fire, when we are grieving and depressed, when we feel unacceptable. Over and over, those are the times that have made us feel more bonded.
May all that is not sacred—all that is not holy, all that is not loving, all that is not respectful, all that is not cherishing—be cast out of this space. We ask that a great light pour forth upon it. We step into this space right now, and where we haven't really known who to be or how to be in relationships, we ask that we be guided and we be taught.
What do you appreciate about yourself that has nothing to do with anything external? In other words, The more you're able to tap into what you appreciate about who you are (not what we do), the more capacity you have for real confidence, peace and self-love.
When I love somebody, I like him to be around; I like him to take me out to dinner; I like to look at the sunset with him. But if not, I love him and I hope he's looking at the same sun I am. Loving someone liberates the lover as well as the beloved. And that kind of love comes with age.
As simple as this may sound, it is very important for you to make one. This list should include everything that brings you pleasure and passion in life. If you aren't sure what brings you joy right now, think back to what used to bring you joy. This may require some exploration, but what did you do when you were a little kid that brought a smile on your face? Did you used to go horseback riding? Walk outside in a garden? Whatever it may be, write it down. This list doesn't mean that you have to do them every day. It's just to make you aware that there are things in the world that do make you feel alive. If you are able to do something you enjoy at least once a week, do it and help yourself feel alive in that moment. You have to behave the way you want to feel before you feel the way you are behaving! It's about opening yourself up to a new experience or something that you stopped doing. Try to rediscover what it feels like to look or feel differently from the 'not enoughness' you have been putting into your head for a long time now. When you start doing this, you will launch yourself back into aliveness!
Feelings of romantic love can boost levels of dopamine, a neurochemical associated with creativity, while sexual desire can raise levels of testosterone, known to promote analytical skills. And these chemical links may have evolved for an important purpose: increasing the likelihood of sexual reproduction. In ancestral days, creative individuals may have used their inventiveness to attract future mates, while sex-focused individuals harnessed analytical clarity and short-term focus in order to bed a partner here and now. Thoughts of either love or sex could pay off in the form of children—the ultimate measure of survival. Children can be the Best thing that comes from sex, when your ready for them only!
Moreover, there are times when we do love without working so damn hard—when we love a child or a friend or an aunt or a dog or a painting or a tree or the stars—and we can draw on those experiences, I think, to love someone, or fall back in love, before both parties achieve perfect and mutual sanity. Our feelings for our beloved will always be deeper than our feelings for an aunt or a tree (although not necessarily for a dog), and they will always be more complicated, but by recalling what simple, pure, joyus, love is actually like, it may be possible to reproduce it under more challenging circumstances."Love was once associated with joy, fun and happiness, and it would be nice if it were so again.
Sometimes jealousy and insecurities can creep into a relationship and create a lot of problems in the bedroom. This week, write down five things you love about your partner, and have him or her do the same. Sit down and share your love lists with each other—you will find that jealously and insecurities will fade!
Sometimes we are so concerned and analytical about whether someone is a good match that we ignore how we actually feel about the people we spend time with. Are you annoyed? Intrigued? Bored? Inspired? Be present on your next date and see how you feel now.
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